“Maybe I’m just not smart enough…”

| Betsy

Said the parents of Harm Van Der Dorpel while their son tried to explain his work to them.

If you make anything even the slightest bit conceptual, chances are you’ve heard this exact phrase, or something eerily close. The dividing line it places between maker (smart) and viewer (less so) completely starts things off wrong as it instantly constructs a barrier between the two. And unlike some barriers, this one is not particularly porous. By placing each other in different camps, we’re prematurely marking the other as well, the other. How can we even begin to think we’re going to break this barrier done? But are artists, crafters, makers, we do think it’s possible. Again and again and again.

Every so often you come across a project so magic, so perfect, so just, well, gorgeous that you want to savor it and take it in all on your own, letting your thoughts guide you through the piece before you discuss it with anyone else. (Or sometimes even have time to ruminate it over yourself, as you just want to take in what is first, before you try and dissect what was.)


How To Explain It To My Parents from Lernert & Sander on Vimeo.




Naomi says:

Almost eleven years ago, I brought a drawing to show my mother in her ICU room. I’d had my final class critique earlier that day, and another student had wanted to buy it, and the teacher remarked on the strength of it. My mom was dying, and had on an oxygen mask. I tacked the drawing where she could see it. She looked at it for a bit, then gasped out between breaths, “That’s . . good. Give . . me . . a . . mo . ment, . . . and then I’ll . . criticize it.” All those years thinking she hadn’t like my work, frozen, finally realizing it wasn’t dislike, it was her pushing me to make ever better work. Sorry for the misunderstanding, Mom, thanks for that final nudge. I still feel it. And thhank you for your brain nudges.

  • Almost eleven years ago, I brought a drawing to show my mother in her ICU room. I’d had my final class critique earlier that day, and another student had wanted to buy it, and the teacher remarked on the strength of it. My mom was dying, and had on an oxygen mask. I tacked the drawing where she could see it. She looked at it for a bit, then gasped out between breaths, “That’s . . good. Give . . me . . a . . mo . ment, . . . and then I’ll . . criticize it.” All those years thinking she hadn’t like my work, frozen, finally realizing it wasn’t dislike, it was her pushing me to make ever better work. Sorry for the misunderstanding, Mom, thanks for that final nudge. I still feel it. And thhank you for your brain nudges.

    1. Oh, Naomi, your comment just made me tear up. :)

      Realizing that my parents don’t dislike my work, they don’t understand
      it was a pretty big revelation. I’m sure you caring enough to bring
      your work to the hospital meant so very much to your mother!! And yes,
      she was pushing you, but solely to make you better, more confident as
      to who you are and most importantly, stronger.

      Thanks so much for sharing your story with us!

  • Oh, Naomi, your comment just made me tear up. :)

    Realizing that my parents don’t dislike my work, they don’t understand
    it was a pretty big revelation. I’m sure you caring enough to bring
    your work to the hospital meant so very much to your mother!! And yes,
    she was pushing you, but solely to make you better, more confident as
    to who you are and most importantly, stronger.

    Thanks so much for sharing your story with us!

  • Betsy, thanks so much for the Brain Pickings love! Glad you enjoyed the parents project – it’s funny how so many of us, despite doing dramatically different things, can relate. Cheers!

  • Betsy, thanks so much for the Brain Pickings love! Glad you enjoyed the parents project – it’s funny how so many of us, despite doing dramatically different things, can relate. Cheers!

    1. Oh, thanks Maria for the comment! I do *LOVE* your newsletter and when I’m not scratching my head trying to figure out just where in the hell you find these awesome awesome links, I’m loving what I learn about each week. What you’re doing is worth it, for better or worse. People do think it’s cool, and do enjoy it!

  • Oh, thanks Maria for the comment! I do *LOVE* your newsletter and when I’m not scratching my head trying to figure out just where in the hell you find these awesome awesome links, I’m loving what I learn about each week. What you’re doing is worth it, for better or worse. People do think it’s cool, and do enjoy it!

    • Comments are closed.